Student Suspended Over Suspected Use of PHP

A case of "shoot first, ask questions later"? :-) Ignatius ----- Original Message ----- From: John Peter Gormley <jgormley@scu.edu.au> To: <blackduck@scu.edu.au> Sent: Monday, June 26, 2000 3:19 PM Subject: For PHP users > This is a true article: > > National News > Wednesday June 14 10:10 PM EDT > > Student Suspended Over Suspected Use of > PHP > Topeka, KS - High school sophomore Brett Tyson was suspended today > after > teachers learned he may be using PHP. > > "A teacher overheard him say that he was using PHP, and as part of our > Zero-Tolerance policy against drug use, he was immediately suspended. > No questions > asked," said Principal Clyde Thurlow. "We're not quite sure what PHP > is, but we > suspect it may be a derivative of PCP, or maybe a > new > designer drug like GHB." > > Parents are frightened by the discovery of this new > menace in > their children's school, and are demanding the > school do > something. "We heard that he found out about PHP at school on the > internet. There > may even be a PHP web ring operating on school grounds," said irate > parent Carol > Blessing. "School is supposed to be teaching our kids how to read and > write. Not > about dangerous drugs like PHP." > > In response to parental demands the school has reconfigured its > internet WatchDog > software to block access to all internet sites mentioning PHP. > Officials say this should > prevent any other students from falling prey like Brett Tyson did. > They have also > stepped up locker searches and brought in drug sniffing dogs. > > Interviews with students suggested that PHP use is wide spread around > the school, but > is particularly concentrated in the geeky nerd population. When > contacted by > BBspot.com, Brett Tyson said, "I don't know what the hell is going on > dude, but this > suspension gives me more time for fraggin'. Yee haw!" > > PHP is a hypertext preprocessor, which sounds very dangerous. It is > believed that > many users started by using Perl and moved on to the more powerful PHP. > For more > information on how to recognize if your child may be using PHP please > visit > http://www.php.net. >