Re: Re: [metabase-dev] MDB news

Hello, On 09/09/2002 04:32 AM, Peter Bowyer wrote:

Trying to use soft words will get you nowhere because people will not understand the importance of things you are talking about.

It's not using soft words. It's being diplomatic. If all world leaders spoke in the same way that you have addressed this list then we wouldn't have to worry about Iraq - everyone else would have already destroyed the planet :)

It seems that you get in the middle of the threads and never noticed that I always try to make people see why things are not as good as they can be and explaining why. That is being diplomatic. The diplomacy ends when people refuse to accept points of view that they never thought with inconsistent excuses that they make up just to not accept such points of view. Usually that is when people like you that seems to not be paying attention since the beginning of the threads jump up as what was said before was not relevant and less diplomatic discussions just popped up from nowhere.

People don't like to be told outright that they are wrong. You have to point it out to them while saving their face - and a straight out "You are wrong, I am right" (no matter if this is true) isn't the way to do it. Explain your reasoning. Rein back from always saying "I got it right years ago, so obey me" (probably not what you mean to say, but that's how it comes over) and instead say "In my experience XXX worked best as..."

I do that, the problem is that people tend to ignore the points until you are direct and put the things the way they are.

I do not doubt your knowledge or experience, but when I hear you talking to people like earlier in this thread, or ranting on again then I think "Why should I listen to someone who talks like this?".

You should pay more attention and read threads from the beginning. Some threads are just continuation of old subjects. Read the archives instead of jumping to conclusions based on just the last messages. You seem like those that want to solve the conflicts of the middle-east without understanding the history of at least the last 6 decades. That way the problems will never be solved. No, I am not going to explain what this means. Do your homework, study history and learn how things got to be the way they are. -- Regards, Manuel Lemos